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Thursday, July 7, 2011

Bed Rest - Day 7

I can't believe this is my 7th day of bed rest already. My follow-up appointment is tomorrow, and I'm really starting to get anxious about it. My mind just keeps wondering about the "what-ifs". What if my cervix is longer, will I still be taken out of work? What if my cervix is shorter? What if my cervix is funneling? What if my cervix is the same? And then everything that revolves around those scenarios.

Matt, and a bunch of people at work, think that I'm done with work until after Cael arrives. I feel the same way, but unless it's medically necessary for me to be out of work, I'm stuck. I can't go out of work without some type of pay coming in (from S-T Disability). And I don't know what the requirements are for someone to be taken out of work and disability to kick in. All I know (or think I know) is that if my cervix continues to be short - whether still at 2cm or shorter - I will be out on ordered bed rest. If it gained length, which would be the best situation, I'm not sure if they could still take me out of work based on the fact that I'm very uncomfortable whenever I get up to move around.

I'm still getting twinges down low, and every time I get up and move around, I get BH's. Does that constitute being pulled out of work? I guess I have to wait until tomorrow to find out. I just can't stop thinking about it. I guess the root of my worrying is the financial aspect - whether or not I'll be getting disability.

Matt got free tickets a month or so ago to a Scranton-WB Yankee's game, through his work. It would be up in the VIP box, which is air conditioned with free food and drink. The game is tonight, and I really want to go since I've been home-bound for the last week. I'm trying to convince Matt that it's the best situation for me to go out, because I won't be in the sun, but in air conditioning; and I'll have access to food and drink. What could be better!? And I just want to get out of the house, and figured this would be a fun time for us. I couldn't get a read on Matt last night when I brought it up again, so I'm just waiting to hear from him as to what he thinks we should do. He said I'm not supposed to be going anywhere, so I'm guessing we'll be staying in tonight. But maybe he'll change his mind. We shall see.

I also had the weirdest dream last night. In my dream, I was asleep, and when I woke up, I had stretch marks all over my belly. Like TONS of them, and they came out of nowhere. I don't have one stretch mark (yet), so this was a very disturbing dream for me; to go from none to a belly full.

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