Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes!!

Oh my goodness, where to start!? I have been slacking on my blog entries lately - I've been so busy. Between chasing after a toddler, doing errands, and the recent happenings going on our lives, I haven't had a chance. But finally, I have time to write.

First and foremost, I'll discuss the changes with breastfeeding. I've successfully managed to wean Cael from all nursing sessions during the day. Lucky for me, he didn't put up a fight when I dropped the session during the day, right before his nap. He whined a little that first day he didn't nurse before his nap, but fell asleep relatively quickly. And each following day got easier and easier. No fight whatsoever. I was really concerned about the possibility of going through hell dropping that feeding, but he did really well. That was about a week ago. He still nurses in the morning when he first wakes up, usually around 6 am, and then right before he goes to bed at around 8 pm. If he's not feeling well, or teething and wakes in the middle of the night, then I'll nurse him then too, but that hasn't been happening too often :::knocks on wood:::. He'll usually sleep through the night from 8 to 5-6 am, so I'm happy about that.

I'm surprisingly ok with weaning all daytime nursing sessions. I think because it was gradual, it made it easier on me. It makes the day so much easier, because he doesn't have to nurse if I'm out, and I don't get engorged. I'm happy that my breasts and milk supply have adjusted so well to the change. And I know I still have milk, because when he nurses in the morning and at night, and I compress my breast, milk will come shooting out. So it makes me happy to know it's still there, but I didn't have to go through engorgement issues. I'm happy with the nursing schedule we have now, and I hope it continues until Cael is at least 18 months old. That was my long-term goal. Anything past that is a plus. I do get looks and questions when people find out that I still nurse. But I don't care. It's such an important and intimate bonding experience between my son and I, and I will continue to do so for as long as I see fit. And there is no research anywhere  that suggests nursing past the age of 1 is harmful. In fact, it's quite the opposite. If Cael and I are happy, and it's benefiting both him and I, then we'll continue to nurse. :-)

Secondly, I've been slacking in the cloth diapering department. To be honest, Cael hasn't had a cloth diaper on in about a week. :( I know, I know. I'm extremely disappointed in myself. I've caved into disposables. And I don't have a real reason as to why, either. I always just found it easier to put him in a disposable when we go out, and of course he wears a disposable at night because he leaks really bad through the cloth diaper. And then when my mother-in-law watches him, I have her use disposables because it's easier for her. So since we use them at night and with my mil, I have them around, and I'm more tempted to just reach for them. I'm going to make a much better effort to start using them again.

Finally, the biggest change and update of all! No, we are not pregnant. I'm returning back to work full-time! In another state!! Yes, Matt, Cael and I are moving to northern Virginia at the end of November. After many discussions between Matt and I, and a lack of jobs here, we decided that we would look elsewhere. Since our friends moved to VA last year that was always an option. So the search for jobs began there. And BAM! Tons of jobs are posted in the Fredericksburg, VA area. After months of thought and debating, and MONTHS and MONTHS of struggling financially, I finally decided to take the leap, and apply to a few ultrasound positions in VA. Within HOURS, I got a personalized e-mail from HR, expressing interest in my resume, and that they wanted to do a phone interview. I applied on Monday October 1st. Three and a half weeks ago. Yes. Weeks!

Enter a roller coaster of emotions! Honestly, I only gave into Matt and applied for the position because he wanted to really move down there, and there was nothing here. At that point, I just did it to shut Matt up. I didn't really want to move down there. I didn't want to go back to work. What had I done!? I didn't want to move, and leave my friends and family. I was disappointed, sad and terrified. But. But they responded to me within hours. Am I that desirable? Could this be a good opportunity? I guess we'll have to see how the phone interview goes.

I had my phone interview on Thursday the 4th, and it went well. She was impressed, and said that she would definitely pass my application along to hiring manager. The next step would be a technical assessment, and she said I will definitely be hearing from someone shortly. Wonderful I thought. I don't want this. I don't want to move. But deep down inside, I was starting to feel something. What is it...is that...excitement?? Shhh!! Don't tell Matt!

The next week on Wednesday I think, I had a surprise phone call from the chief sonographer at the imaging center for women. I was completely caught off guard, but our conversation went even better than the first phone interview. We were on the phone for over an hour, and I was so comfortable speaking to her. She did character questions, we talked about my breast ultrasound experience, equipment, etc. She told me that she is definitely impressed with me, and she would love to have me visit the hospital for an on-site meeting/interview. Say what!?!? I said that I would be more than willing to do that. I asked her when they were looking to fill the position. Her answer? As soon as you can come down here. Whenever you can start. WHAT?!?? Not, "As soon as we find the right candidate," or "As soon as we are finished interviewing candidates." It was as soon as YOU. Holy.Fuck.

The next day, I got a call from HR again, confirming that I wanted to come on-site. I agreed, and she said she would send me the hotel information via email, and that the hospital would cover the costs of our hotel stay. I got the hotel reservations on Friday the 12th. We were going to VA Tuesday night, and staying until Thursday. This is going way to fast. WAY too fast for me to deal with!

Virginia is beautiful, I have to admit that. The hospital is beautiful. This would be a nice place to work and live. Everyone was so nice, especially at the hotel. It was a 1 bedroom suite we stayed in, and the entire staff was so friendly. I told one person that I had a job interview, and before I knew it, everyone was saying "good luck on your interview!", or asking how my interview went. Wow. It's crazy, and almost sickening, how nice everyone is.

I went on my interview on Wednesday the 17th. I first toured the on-site daycare center, which was really nice. A bit pricey, but I love that it's curriculum and education based. Plus, they have an open door policy, so I can call or visit anytime I want. Perfect! Then the recruiting rep took me on a tour of the hospital, bought me lunch, and then we headed over to the woman's center. I met with the chief sonographer and she showed me around the center. We talked for a while, and then she had me scan.

I knew I'd be scanning someone, and I thought it would all come back to me like riding a bike. Well, let me tell you, I felt like a complete.failure. She was quizzing me on abdominal anatomy that I SHOULD have known. But because it's been a couple years since I've scanned general ultrasound, I was really sketchy and iffy on the answers. And even got some answers wrong. I told her to let me scan breast, because that is where I really shine. So I did, and she was impressed with my scanning. Since the center scans 85% breast, she was more concerned about how I scanned breast, and because I did well, she wasn't concerned about my incorrect answers, or discomfort with scanning general. I, on the other hand, was very upset. I hate being wrong, especially when it's about something I know I know well. I just need a refresher, and she said that is something I can work on.

After I scanned, she told me that she definitely wants me to join their team. I told her I would love that, and then she said she would inform HR, and I'd be hearing from them. Holy.Fuck. I'm going to be getting a job offer!

I'll skip the other details and get right to it. I got a call on Friday from the recruiter in HR, and she offered me the position! Unfortunately, the hourly pay was a little less than I needed in order for us to move down there with just my salary. Matt and I had been crunching numbers and figuring out different scenarios, and we knew what I needed in order to move there. She also told me that they would cover my relocation expenses up to $8000!! I tried to negotiate salary with her, but she informed me that the salary is created using a formula, and there will probably be little leeway for negotiating. She said that she would talk to the manager, and if they couldn't increase the salary, maybe they could do something like a sign-on bonus for me. Perfect! I hung up, and waited for the phone call. A couple of hours later, she made me an "offer I couldn't refuse."

Salary would remain the same, $8000 towards relocation AND a $10,000 sign-on bonus. Excuse me, what? I told her I would call her right back, and I called Matt at work. I told him what they just offered me, and he nearly shit himself. My same reaction. He said that is something we can definitely work with, and even though the salary is less, we will be more than okay with that sign-on bonus (which I get in my first paycheck) until Matt can find a job. I called her back, and accepted the offer. How could I not?

I got my hire letter via e-mail today. My start date is December 3rd, in which I have to do 1.5 days of orientation. I have to so much to do! I have pre-employment paperwork to fill out, pre-employment physical to do, renew my CPR, oh and yea, FIND A PLACE TO LIVE all in 5 weeks! We want to be there the last week in November, which, unfortunately, is around Thanksgiving. But maybe we can have our first Thanksgiving there with our best friends. Not to mention I have to solicit estimates from 3 moving companies for my relocation costs.

What an amazing opportunity. At this point, I'm still really upset about moving, in addition to feeling sad and terrified. But I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little excited. What an incredible offer and opportunity for me. We can finally be out on our own, and we won't be struggling. We won't be living paycheck to paycheck, and we can give Cael everything we want; give him things we didn't have growing up. I'm not a big fan of change, but I think this change is worth the stress and anxiety.