I Feel Like Whining

So today, I tried on bathing suits at Target so that I had something that fit my increasing boob size for the summer. Well, that started a downhill stress-fest, which included feeling bad for myself, as well as stressing about Cael's arrival. For starters, I feel fat. I know, I know. I'm pregnant. I don't feel fat in my face, belly or upper body, but more in my thighs and butt. I'm sure it was the lighting in the changing room, but my gosh - my legs and butt were lumpy with cellulite. It really made me upset and depressed, and feel bad about myself. So enter mopey mood there.

Then I realized that I only have about 9 weeks left before Cael gets here, and I started stressing about our finances, and how much less I'll be making when I'm out on short-term disability; and then when I go back to work and am paying for daycare. It's very overwhelming, and I'm trying not to stress about it. I've been good so far, but as my due date approaches, the anxiety is creeping up on me.

Finally, add to the list how I'm growing increasing uncomfortable. And I still have 9 weeks left. My belly is tight, and I have constant pressure down low from Cael head-butting my cervix and bladder. There's also pressure up high when he's positioned higher, and it presses into my lungs and stomach. Not to mention every time I sneeze or blow my nose, I pee myself a little. I know he still needs to finishing "cooking", and I shouldn't already feel this way, but I'm ready for him to be out, and me to feel normal again.

The Big 3-0 Weeks!!

•How far along?: 30 weeks!! Squeee!

•How big is baby?: Head of lettuce! 18 inches tall and about 3.2 pounds!

•Movement: Tons! He loves sticking his little butt out of my belly, and sticking his feet in my ribs. He does more rolling, pushing and moving, than he does hard kicks. Either way, I love it so much!

•Stretch marks?: Nope!

•Sleep?: I get real uncomfortable as soon as I lay down in bed to go to sleep. I know I toss and turn all night, and I have to get up at around 2-3 am every morning to pee. So basically, sleep is getting worse.

•Symptoms?: Braxton Hicks, peeing a lot, pressure down low.

•Food aversions?: Not currently.

•Food cravings?: Still: Mac&Cheese, pasta, and anything with cheese! And MEAT - cheeseburgers, venison, steak.

•Labor signs?: Nope. Just BH's.

•Belly button in or out?: Still even with my belly. Although, the top half occasionally pops out a little.

•What I miss: Bending over and moving easily.

•What I'm looking forward to: Getting construction started so that we can get Cael's nursery set up. I can't wait to nest.

•Best Moment this week: Feeling Cael have the hiccups, even though Matt couldn't feel them on the outside.

•Milestone: Being 30 weeks!

((This is a collage of weeks 5, 15 and 30, to show my belly progression))

Today I started to wean off of my Celexa, and onto Wellbutrin. For two weeks, I will take Wellbutrin every day, and Celexa every other day. After the two weeks, I stop the Celexa, and continue taking the Wellbutrin every day. This should help avoid any withdrawal symptoms that Cael would go through after birth from the Celexa. I've gone through Celexa/Lexapro withdrawals myself, and I would not want my son to go through them. So this is the best option. I just hope the Wellbutrin works just as good for me, and keeps my anxiety, palpitations and depression at bay.

We also found out that the Contractor can start our construction at the end of July! I am so happy and excited that we finally have a time frame - and it's only 4 weeks away until we have a nursery for Cael. And then I can nest all I want, and prepare his nursery. I'm so excited and can't wait. The only thing is that I will be around 35 weeks when the construction is done, so it's cutting it close to when Cael will be here. But it will all work out.

:::I Love You So Much, Cael Matthew:::

I Love Baby Clothes! And Sales!!

We hit a good sale at The Children's Place, where we got everything on clearance or sale. Everything is so adorable, that we couldn't resist. And the kicker? We spent no more than $28!! Perfect!

29 Weeks!! And A Belly Growth Spurt!

•How far along?: 29 weeks!

•Current Weight: Yesterday, I weighed 135.

•Total weight gain: +12 from pre-pregnancy weight.

•How big is baby?: Size of a squash or small cabbage! 17 inches tall and about 2.9 pounds!

•Movement: Definitely more in the last week. His feet reach my ribs and diaphragm now, so they're starting to hurt.

•Stretch marks?: Nope!

•Sleep?: Same old.

•Symptoms?: Rib pain, kidney pain, leg cramps, Braxton Hicks, pain with deep breaths.

•Food aversions?: Not currently.

•Food cravings?: Still: Mac&Cheese, pasta, and anything with cheese! And MEAT - cheeseburgers, venison, steak.

•Labor signs?: Nope. Just BH's.

•Belly button in or out?: Still even with my belly. Although, the top half occasionally pops out a little.

•What I miss: Bending over.

•What I'm looking forward to: Getting construction started so that we can get Cael's nursery set up.

•Best Moment this week: Finding out Cael is absolutely perfect at our appointments this week! His heart is perfect, and we don't have to worry about his brain. We are so happy - definitely a great moment.

•Milestone: Being 29 weeks!

Cael Is Perfect!

So we have a lot of updates regarding appointments. We went to the Pediatric Cardiologist on Tuesday in Syracuse, and we learned that everything with Cael's heart was fine. Perfectly fine! Aside from some "bright areas" that they did see in his heart, everything is structurally perfect. So therefore, the bright spots mean nothing, and everything is perfect. It was such a relief, and worth the 2.5 hour drive to Syracuse.

I also had a regular OB appointment today, which also went awesomely. My midwife confirmed that everything with Cael's heart looked great on Tuesday. I also gained another 5 pounds, which I guess I'm not happy about, but Matt said is great. I guess I should be gaining weight, right? Oh yea, I also passed my Glucose Tolerance test! Yippee!! And then when I asked about re-checking the lateral ventricles in his brain, my midwife said everything is fine, because there weren't any notes about it anywhere. So I don't need another ultrasound until 36 weeks. Matt and I are so happy! Of course, I'm happier and fine with them not re-checking the ventricles, because I had his brain "secretly" checked at work yesterday. They still only measured 9mm, which, although is considered "upper limits of normal", is still normal. So no more worrying for us! We couldn't be happier!

Unfortunately, I'm starting to develop mild hydronephrosis of my right kidney, which is causing some aches and pain on my right side in the back. This is a normal occurrence in the 3rd trimester, and there isn't anything they can do about unless it's causing severe pain and/or fever. It's just something I have to deal with, but it will be all worth it in the end. :)

Baby Shower Pictures! 06.12.2011

This won't be much of a wordy post, as I just wanted to share a few pictures from my shower yesterday. We got a lot of wonderful stuff - including a Pack-N-Play, Infant Car Seat, walker, and lots of other things. We are so grateful, and had a wonderful time with our friends and family.

28 Weeks!! (And 1 Day)

•How far along?: 28 weeks!

•Current Weight: At home, I weighed 131 yesterday.

•Total weight gain: +8 from pre-pregnancy weight.

•How big is baby?: Size of an eggplant (or head of cauliflower)! 15 inches tall and about 2.5 pounds!

•Movement: All the time! No rib kicks yet though.

•Stretch marks?: Nope! Not yet, anyway.

•Sleep?: It's ok. I'm more tired though.

•Symptoms?: Cramping, stretching, leg cramps, Braxton Hicks.

•Food aversions?: Nothing I can think of.

•Food cravings?: Still: Mac&Cheese, pasta, and anything with cheese! And MEAT - cheeseburgers, venison, steak.

•Labor signs?: Nope. Just BH's.

•Belly button in or out?: Still even with my belly. Although, the top half occasionally pops out a little.

•What I miss: Moving around easily and quickly. Bending over.

•What I'm looking forward to: Finding out everything with Cael's heart and brain is ok - hopefully. Our appointment is tomorrow on Tuesday.

•Best Moment this week: My baby shower yesterday. It was so much fun, and we got a lot of great stuff for Cael!

•Milestone: Being 28 weeks.

:::Keep growing, Baby Cael:::

Twenty-7 Weeks!!

•How far along?: 27 weeks! Oh my!

•How big is baby?: Size of a cucumber! 15 inches tall and about 2.2-2.4 pounds!

•Movement: Multiple times during the day. However, I haven't been able to get his sleep schedule down yet.

•Stretch marks?: Nope! Thankfully!

•Sleep?: So-so. I'm starting to get more tired now.

•Symptoms?: BH's, SEVERE back pain, RLP, leg cramps.

•Food aversions?: Nothing currently.

•Food cravings?: Still: Mac&Cheese, pasta, PIZZA and anything with cheese!

•Labor signs?: Just BH's. And their not real labor anyway.

•Belly button in or out?: Even with my belly.

•What I miss: Moving around easily and quickly. Bending over without my belly in the way.

•What I'm looking forward to: Feeling Cael kick more, and establishing his sleep cycles. Also, my baby shower is next weekend, as is my best friends. I'm really excited!

•Best Moment this week: Everything!

•Milestone: Every passing day and week. Today I am pregnant, and I love my Cael.

:::It's amazing; I love you so much already!:::